Yes because finding a guy to give head to is pretty difficult.
I mean not really
Obviously that's why it was a joke you are so stupid it's impossible.
My parents came down to check and make sure I wasn't into any mischief then proceeded to give me alcohol.
how does Santa get into Hogwarts?
She refers to my dick as princess Sarah... oddly I'm okay with that.
You do realize it's a Tuesday, right?
You do realize I stopped giving a fuck about calendars when I was 10, right? And besides, it could be the best Tuesday of your life.
BTW, it's bullshit to say that not doing a shot is unpatriotic. You know how I fall for that.
I swear the pregnant cashier was jealous when I bought my plan B
You fought the bouncer and lost, then challenged a hobo to a 40 chugging contest and lost. Sobriety is a good life choice.
Who's nuvaring is under my pillow?
One day. I will touch his hair. I'm curious if it'll be like a soft cloud.
watched my neighbor eat five yodels, mow his lawn, and then cry on his porch after the party... what did you give him?
Please tell me I didn't try to make out with a 70 year old Romanian man last night ...
driving home hungover today was like a life test..it was like the goblet of fire
We left him in some bushes a few blocks down toward campus. Did he find his way home?
The drive thru lady at McDonald's asked how I was and I responded by opening the car door and throwing up all over the drive thru lane. Happy Sunday.
Randomize
