Wedsnesdays are always enlightening. Tonights revealation: One should not smoke from something taller than their person.
I think I'm going to die by hangover. I'm in my spanish class. So I guess I'm going to be muerte.
I know I'm not learning anything when I can't even spell the name of the class I'm taking
i thought they made a 7-hour walmart run, but they were actually in jail.
I really can't get over how proud I am of all us getting laid at the same time in the same apartment
Where would I incorporate "your boyfriend fucked the shit out of me last night" before or after Merry Christmas bitch?
she did 8 shots of vodka. THROUGH A SIPPY STRAW
I have got to meet this girl.
He took off his priest costume and proceeded to dryhump the teletubby.
she walked in on me throwing up in the sink with my pants around my ankles and I said "i'll be with you in a sec"
If fixing it is ignoring it, and getting naked. Then yes we fixed it.
Your brother just walked into my room, pissed drunk and butt naked, got into my bed and fell asleep. In knowing I am gay, you have one hour to deal with him before I do
My mom added me on Snapchat which means I am officially done with Snapchat.
I think the hamburger goblin stole my cigarettes. I left my purse behind her table and they're not in it now.
I need you to get the emergency bail money out if the stuffed panda and go to the police station tot bail me out. I should be there in 20 minutes.
Only good thing about being an essential worker is that I have a letter allowing me to cross the bridge into jersey to get booze
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