i have now learned nap means the same thing as sex in college
Never let Scott cook bacon and eggs at 2am while drunk. You should have seen the flames.
Ok love is a little strong. But he consented to Nachos, beer and board game date with my cats. Keeper.
the black eye was caused by a 12 year old girl in a vampire costume who punched you in the face after you aggresively screamed "TEAM JACOB!" in her face & howled at the moon...
Always thought my first night in jail would consist of fire and a bunny suit.
I don't think blacking out in class is a good idea. But I'm game
I'm standing outside of the bar watching homeless men teach a kid how to pee of the sidewalk.
The last thing I remembered was laying in the bathtub fully clothed with the shower running while he was picking grilled cheese out of my hair. I couldn't figure out if i was more upset about being soaking wet or the fact that my grilled cheese was in my hair instead of my mouth.
I just hate that one day I'll have to tell our children how we met, makes me look like a gold digging whore
dude, i warned you that using a card to pay for my hotel room was a bad idea. You deserve the extra $600 in cleaning fees
Dude, he threw a pool chair off of an 8 story building. It was a successful night I'd say.
she basically told me that her vine videos last longer that I do
You shut your whore mouth, we don't talk about Drunk Nutella night.
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
I spent two entire hours explaining to a guy why I wouldn't make out with him. How was your night?
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