Man, ugly runs in her family
yeah, big time
Just think, the more you drink, the more options you'll have of people you want to hook up with.
I guess what I'm trying to say is you've fucked more people than the economy.
I am drunk at a castle and it isn't even 3. Europe is amazing.
We're playing a drinking game to 'how to train your dragon'. has it really come to this?
Two words. Shotgunning Cognac.
This has already gotten way out of hand
I want a burrito.
Truly, you are the voice of a generation.
I don't know. Something about answering "what did you do on Sunday?" Seems odd when the reply is, painted, went to the grocery store, put a restraint device on my bed.
I just slammed another champagne, swaggered over to her, pointed across the room at the 20 y/o lacrosse player and whispered loudly, "I brought that one for YOU." I'm getting a raise.
Just tried to dig out holes in my mattress for my boobs so I could be comfortable lying down on my stomach
Napping in front of family members can be embarrassing when you get a christmas boner in your sleep
What has my life come to that I have to spank someone in morse code?
He said he wanted to lick the breadcrumbs off my chest
I want to eat a stick of butter
Did your pain meds kick in?
It tastes nice
Keep two things coming: nudes and puppy pictures
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