he refuses to go down on me anymore when he's high because he thinks my clit piercing stares at him
That girl would be way hotter if she changed her face.
I had another sleeping on concrete incident.
Literally just spent 45 minutes converting my paintball gun to shoot condoms....
We started snorting MDMA at 3 in the afternoon...it was never going to end well.
Considering the fact that you wouldn't give me my cat last night because he was "destined for broadway", yeah, I'm accusing you of stealing him
She gave him a lap dance on the glass table. You can guess how that ended
It's only 10 in the morning...josh is already on the way to the ER for trying to shotgun a beer with a sparklers sticking out of it on fire.
Fuck morning classes and our weekday drinking habits.
The chick got into the cab with us and said we have 3 chances to guess what she just stuck up her ass. Hello to you to!
What's the address and code again...does anyone need anything and why is my viking helmet on the bed?
All I'm saying is that if you have time for a 20 min shower bj you have time for me
Dude I'm so clean right now. Like I feel insulted that I can pass a piss test.
Crying in Target on a display sofa is normal, right? Asking for a friend.
She'd probably like you more if you'd stop fucking her husband.
Randomize
