just wrote on a church. and then stalked a boy, by the way, i fucked him. him being your friend, also, love tacos.
does it bother you that i swallowed like millions of your unborn children
actually, i try not to think about it
and i pooped them out
Shit sorry. Maybe I wont give you this sweet ass fanny pack I found in my parents attic
Did you push me into the oil wrestling or did I elect to do it?
You said you wanted to do it, but I gave you a friendly nudge.
I'm so proud of us for fucking the same friend group before we met in a completely unrelated instance.
I'm still trying to figure out how you came back with chinese food, and a spoon covered in icing saying 'cake..'
Just fucked in a kitchen. I never want my penis that close to knives, stoves, or blenders ever again.
I learn from experience and I experienced what it would be like to completely lose my mind and then wake up with a stab wound.
Quick how do you hit on a guy in the car behind you? It's important.
he came during what was supposed to be the foreplay blowjob. there goes my evening.
Not as great as when your drunk mom grabbed my junk, but better than when your sober grandma sacktapped me and grabbed my butt.
I'll do whatever I want when I'm 80.
If you are still alive at 80 I demand a medical explanation.
I wasn't that gone.
Dude, you cried and said how sorry you were when we asked why you had the dip.
So I decided to sleep with him for the first time in months so I can convince him it's his kid instead of the other guy
She won't let me meet her hot new boy toy just because she thinks it'll lead to us having a threesome. It's not fair. I thought we were friends...
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