There's a 34yo winking at me. Why do i find this weird when my bf is a 38yo married man?
I told my ex i loved him and then he sent me a picture of this girl laying on his bed.
I got "discovered a new religion high" last night
Best idea ever: Giving hobos a beer and having a chugging contest to win another beer. Most fun I have had downtown in a while.
When you wake up in your dorm right outside your room with the key in the door, then you will understand my pain.
Drunk you is everything I aspire to be in life.
I swear, its like my old fuck buddies have a 6th sense for when I'm going to be daydrunk. Then they start texting me. And then I start sexting them
Omg one side of my Labia is asleep. Has that ever happened to you?
I woke up wearing my panties and an eyelash, soo I'd say your birthday was a success.
We started off talking about nice cuddling and you turned it into fucking with a Santa hat on...
Well, we 69'd in the Jacuzzi. If that tells you the kind of night I had. Neither of us knew we could hold our breath that long. Deff. Most. Dangerous. Sex. Ever.
Well, if it's rabies, your lips will swell just prior to the frothing. Get a lot of good pics!
She said she was sorry for rolling around in her own vomit. Honestly, I thought it really added to the party.
I just made myself orgasm twice and Laura lee hit 4 million subscribers. It’s a good day everywhere
Don't EVER mix a flaming shot, with a Jello shot.. As good as it sounds flaming Jello is not a good idea
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