You look like a girl that would like strip clubs
the crunchwrap supreme is the def leppard of the taco bell menu
which is why it's clearly superior
He said we were driving the golf cart through the woods screaming 'iceroad truckers' for four hours in the dark
This was all being yelled across a beer pong table as all important things should be discussed
how did you get vomit on both your shoulders. I mean think about it.
I just found scrambled eggs in my shower. Thanks for that, asshole.
Sorry but i am wayy to hungover to take mom to her AA meeting.
Wont she be proud, Hailey.
It's 9am. I'm four lines ahead of you already. Wake up.
Those mornings you wake up with a Barbie tramp stamp are the mornings that are the that are going to make me miss this place
It is very possible that having sex with you just now just got me into Yale
I just said "okay we have 20 minutes to get each other off, ready... Set... Go!" and he picked me up and threw me on the bed. I almost came just from that.
Makes sense. My grandma just did this shot. MY FAMILY KICKS ASS.
Not gonna lie, Wednesday was the perfect day to get laid off, all I've done since is watch the Simpsons marathon
Dude. why do I feel like I am cheating on you every time I do shrooms?
FYI bail money is still in my drawer. I know you have no car but you need to know this for tomorrow.
Randomize
