Yeah, where have you been?
Clearly not facebooking enough. Sweet jesus.
just throwing this out there: period starts tomorrow sooo either sex tonight or not until tues/weds.
i get a bj anyways so it's really your choice.
k i'll be over in 5.
i'm crying at olive garden. i've hit rock bottom
what is with people arguing over soda or pop? to be honest i thought it was just called chaser
We shouldn"t be alone together
you didn"t say that yesterday
you weren't married yesterday
I got to explain to the guys at work today how i had no choice but to go to a gay bar because I was handcuffed to a lesbian.
I did the mature thing and subtweeted that bitch. She follows me so she'll see.
All I remember is waking up with 3 penises pointed at my face. I also remember enjoying that a lot. And then I threw up in their shower.
her mom went out of her way to book us a room with separate beds... her level of gay denial is in beast mode
If you make 120 dollars and I walk instd of drive and don't eat or smoke this week we can pay rent
When you can pee with one hand accurately while texting, you drink too much.
Virginity is like the pottery barn-you break it, you bought it.
Thanks....I've always wanted my vagina compared to an overpriced coffee table
I found our waiter on grindr, gave him my number, and got him to send a dick pic. Still not getting laid but close enough?
im drinking out of a pineapple, so yea.
She deleted me on Facebook. I think it's safe to say that she knows I fucked him now.
Randomize