Omg I def was not. I wasn't that drunk. I showed that I stuff my bra but I didn't whip my tit out.
I woke up this morning and was hoping we drank enough last night to have a unicorn drawn on my wrist. Good News: We did.
She made a list of the things each of us had done wrong and assigned a point system. Guess who came out the loser?
It's official. Every single female in their late teens and early 20s get their fb statuses from a pool of cliched "quotes" which all say, without saying, "boys treat me like shit, I know they do, but one day I'll find 'the guy' who will treat me right no matter how psychotic I am." Vom.
Dude... Hand job in the lake... It was as weird as it sounds.
tequila makes me forget i have legs
I vomited in the sink and my bra was in there...I don't even have words to describe this hangover confusion
I considered my 2012 starting right when the cop followed the wrong car for the bottle rocket we shot at him
The lady at target couldn't scan my grocery item and just looked at me and said "just take it. I hate this fucking place". Best munchie adventure yet.
Don't even start with me. You know damn well if you walked into a bathroom with two girls naked in the shower you would stay too. Regardless how drunk I was or whether or not you were my ride.
the manischevitz sangria was a big hit
You set fire to his cat.
In my defense, I did not think it would be in the trash bag.
I'm surprised this is your first encounter with pepper spray. surprised, and somewhat proud.
is it bad that there is a girl in my bed right now and the only thing i can think about is the fect that its after 3am which means i cant order jimmyjohns unitll tomorrow?
you woke up this morning in a laundry basket, only wearing rainboots.
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