All the good ones are taken. All that's left is the Harry Potter geek or the asshole in the corner. I think I'll settle for Harry Potter.
With such a small dick you'd think he'd try to make up for it with some sort of personality.
my neighbors are having lesbo sex right now.
I'm on my way.
I have bruises everywhere. I think I took "the drinks are strong" as more of a challenge than a warning.
The best revenge is living well. Or pooping in his sunroof. Either or
I think we need to stage an Intervention. Her Instagram is a call for help.
You fell asleep mid blowjob with my vibrator in your HAND. So no, I will not bring you pizza.
If I remember correctly I tried to steal a mail truck last night
Should I take a fireball shot or brush my teeth?
When you leave ur sleepover boy on ur front porch waiting for a cab bc work
I'm drunk still and I cried and now I'm watching Whitney Houston singing the national anthem and I'm crying more
How high?! We watched paid programming for 45 minutes before we realized it wasn't just a long commercial. So pretty high. The Bionic fish finder looks promising, though.
Lets get a boat first.
I wonder if the sex shop has any Black Friday deals.
Just woke up beside some twink in a kilt.. how is your sunday going
You went after him with a sword while screaming “FAJITAS!”. And Todd was dressed as a Goth for some reason
Randomize
