Should I ask him to prom mid fuck? That way he has to say yes.
As of tonight I have officially had sex during every Disney movie.
im pretty sure thats the first step to being a pedafile
the last thing i remember was trying to convince him to call over his girlfriend so we could have a threesome
I don't know how but I have our hotel room door handle in my purse... this can not be good
Just saw a woman with a Pomeranian in her bra. Way to step up your game Seattle.
The bouncer yelled at him for poking at the guy selling roses, I think it's time to leave.
posting about faith hill is really not helping you get me into your bed
Wanna smoke some ancient weed I just found in a box of cake mix?
I woke up to the sound of him repeatedly tapping out SOS in Morse Code using his hard cock.
On Tinder, guy asked me if I had ever been fucked by a Pokemon master. Needless to say I didn't respond.
Road head absolutely translates. That's the beauty of road head... It's so portable!
Bra is off & I'm snuggled in a pizza. Adulting is good.
I need a pedicure
You need to go to planned parenthood
Im goin to jail bro ill talk to u sun
Fuck my life... Im so horny Im gonna take it out on this sandwich
Randomize
