belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
..Thats also how I think I got the lyrics from MIAs Paper Planes Sharpeed on my ass? Maybe.
I've decided that life's journeys are more fun when your moral compass hangs in front of you and swings with each step
why does he think he needs to feed/take me out to get some ass? we are at a bar wasting my fucking time
My 8 year old wants to name our new cat "fur burger". how do i explain that this is not really appropriate?
For once I'm glad there wasn't morning sex. Yes, that sore from the night before.
The cop refused to sing with us, even though he was as happy as we were that the tow truck finally showed up.
I dont even remember coming home... All my stuff is strewn randomly around my apartment... And I woke up at 5 sitting propped up in my bed with just my arm in a shirt
He was handing out home-made business cards that read "finger slamming bitches since 1986"\n
She's posted my bail. Twice. Of course I'm going to be her wing girl.
Well ill be drunk so just come find me. Its like where in the world is Joey San Diego
There may or may not be an ass shaped dent in the hood of my car. All I know is windshield wipers aren't as sturdy as you think to hold onto.
we got stoned then he started showing me how to make his penis look like a hamburger...if that's not true love idk what love is
We fucked to Bonnie Tyler in my car. He's the one.
Hi I am on my way. I stopped and got the cheeseburger you asked for. Are you gonna pay me back?
Who is this?
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