Def gonna have stinky sex sometime soon. GOT TO! she has eligible friends for you, as well.
I hate when laundry day is determined by the number of cum stains on my bed
His dick was so small it sat perched on top of his balls like it was king of his scrotum.
I'm drinking while I write this paper. When I can't see the screen anymore I'm gonna come out
4 maple syrup blunts. Decided to sit on my roof and count the snowflakes that landed on my tongue. 84.
they're using the ping pong table for ping pong. it's weird
He gave me his number and said the usual call whenever you need someone but then was like... or just call me.
You would pick up a guy in AA.
I got a Luke Skywalker costume so I can go do battle with the homeless guy who plays the fiddle dressed as Darth Vader downtown.
Having never done that before, When should one expect the horrible shame to end? Days, months, ever?
A week or so, depending on size. In your case, maybe give it a month.
btw theres a pine tree in the downstairs shower. the guys thought it would be a great free air freshener.
Oh shit I just realized the ropes are still tied to the bedposts
holy shit i just had sex in a phone booth i so feel young again
Sean slept in the bushes beside my house again. Any reason he kept screaming/slurring 'it was all a bunch of goddamn lies' through out the night?
you missed 2am bagpipes and my roommate looking hot as fuck in a kilt
I feel like my vagina was punched by chuck Norris, a Brazilian chuck Norris.
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