Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
you just stared at your feet and said some shit about the molecules dancing and how you had just solved physics.
there's got to be a less slutty way to tell him the baby isn't his
Dont judge me. Him and his friends got me drunk for free, the least i could do was suck his dick
I have the Lakers game on, but all I can think about is having sex with you. Not sure what you've done here.
I wanna thank you for having such slutty friends growing up. Your a great little sister
We ended up sleeping in the emergency room for safety (you know, well lit, cameras..) and then an ambulance drove us to the train station around 4am. great last night in australia.
So it's national ass day?! I love October. No bra last Saturday and now ass day. This is my month. God is dedicating this October to me!
do you think this outfit says "I maintained my dignity this weekend"?
New guy at work just gave me a Percocet for my headache. Officially best friends
I'll miss you, too. On the bright side, a night away from one another might give me a chance to recup seminal fluids.
I was drunk and really grossed out when you poured cheese on me and, I guess I just freaked out.
Thought about it. I'm gonna go to work, but I'm gonna tell them I wrestled a bear saying I fell just isn't working.
Happy anniversary, did you sign and mail in the divorce papers yet?
Just so you know sleeping with you is like skydiving commando in a flightsuit made of kittens
That's the most romantic thing I've ever heard
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