Is there a tactful way for me to ask a girl to let me know when she gets her period?
great time with ya sorry i wasn't one of the three guys you wanted to stay with
My mom gets in bar fights. She doesn't go to bed early.
I just had a librarian tell me that "wikipedia is like sex"
When he expanded on the analogy it actually made sense. "you're going to do it either way, so I'm just going to tell you how to do it safely."
I mean, I'd wanted to go skinny dipping, hook up with him and have sex on a beach, so last night I basically killed 3 birds with one super slutty stone.
Just because you were able to pour the entire bottle of wine into 2 glasses does not mean you took it easy last night.
Did I crawl through the hotel lobby all the way to our room?
I'm flagged. Drank strippers water. Flashed Dave tryin to get a job here. You order the shots. Green tea betch.
Tipped our cab with a photo booth pic of us, a paper dollar, a dollar in quarters, a crest white strip. And a tanning pass valid in boston
Your cock is gonna weep like a baby
He kept telling me Te Amo last night. Over and over. And that he was scared. Drunkenly. In Spanish.
he just fucked me for my cheese..
Let's just wait to see what happens before we start making radical plans and starting fires
Hey bro are you still alive??? I'm sure you are wondering how you ended up laying on the floor at the foot of your bed and why there is a wheelchair by your door....
I threw up outside. Then I peed got off the toilet and threw up. While I threw up u pulled up my pants. Not my best moment
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