if socks could get pregnant i would have catholic amounts of kids
so id say it was a successful trip...i only got hit on by one cousin...
When i asked him what happened all he said was, the toucan... the toucan... over and over again.
yea, their son has been arrested on more than one occassion, their daughter is pregnant and their other daughter graduated but she was adopted, so clearly genes are everything.
I demanded respect from my fuck buddy. Drunk me is not fun.
If anyone ask I'm rushing for brotherhood, not so that this bartender will suck my dick
Casually had to file a missing persons report last night
He burnt his arm on the grill, then turned around and started blaming it on the burger buns...I think it's safe to say he's drunk.
I'll explain later but basically I was feeling dangerous, I'm dressed as Ann Romney and Ann Romney is a bad bitch.
When my parents ask if I met any nice guys in California, I'm going to answer, "No, but I have gone home with alot of nice girls". Too much, too soon?
Can we make 2014 the year of no unsolicited dick pics?
Let's put it this way, there's not many girls I wouldn't let sit on my face
he woke up this morning, drunk as fuck, butt ass naked, and he had left grandmas gun on the counter and doesn't know why.
No I'm not high but I did cry for over an hour tonight because I realized that they never made a sequel to "Under the Tuscan Sun" with Diane Lane.
Anytime you wish.we are doing double shots in the kitchen,and I drank a beer in the shower,so...the sooner you get here,the sooner you can get on our level.
Randomize
