Boobs. All I remember is boobs.
Me too. I'd like to spend all next summer high and drunk and riding ponies and boys.
We did face masks and fucked...he really isn't gay, what they say about europeans is just true
I just claimed my unemployment in Vegas. This seems wrong.
The bartender gave me a roll of masking tape so I could tape my heels to my feet so I wouldn't lose them when i went drunk running later that night
I just sent a friend request to someone saying that i was the girl he shared a fifth of jager with last week. Thats something special. He better accept.
I love my boobs, they're the only thing that supports me. They make me a solid 6.
sitting in my room in a shopping cart. they couldnt get my legs out of the holes. i want breakfast.
When you called me you were telling a hobo that you couldn't spare ten bucks bc that was your beer money. All your words were slurred.
Fuck him.
Sometimes I just want to serenade his penis with cheesy 80s songs.
I peed my pants and am still dancing with guys at the club because I liked my outfit too much to change. Call the ratchet emergency
Just bailed on her the best way possible. Got tickets to the game. Only issue is.... if we lose, we not only lost, but I skipped sex to watch us lose
Herpes is not a lady problem you can solve with shower beers and kissing boys
Nice. Ask if they watched saved by the bell. yes=legal. No=jailbait
Well I'm glad your Saturday night went a lot better than mine. I spent mine crying in a McDonald's parking lot.
Randomize
