We're like a lot better than the average bears
it was beautiful and magic like when a hot girl grabs her own tits and smiles at you
Let me rephrase. Would it display my intentions too much if i walked all the way across my office and into the bathroom carrying my book
dude, never take two tylenol pm and smoke three bowls. i feel like i'm covered in cold ants.
i went to a real vip club. the bathroom attendant was wiping down counters after girls wearing gucci did lines of coke on them. where did MY life go wrong
thought i was the most hungover person in class until i saw a kid puke into his bookbag...he wins
I'm glad you trust me to be your sex stat keeper.
You were hanging upside down on the subway with your feet in the stirrup handle bars. the children were amused.
I've been timing it. He's been showering alone for 33 minutes. 4 minutes ago, he said "truth or dare." haven't heard anything since.
One day, tell me please to stop buying shots when I'm overwhelmed. I might have just broken a tooth
The claw marks on my back are healing nicely. Just thought you should know.
My bad. Next time I'll wear mittens.
He dared you to draw a map of the USA on your wall in mustard. You drew something that vaguely resembled a velociraptor eating Oklahoma, got embarrassed because you forgot how to spell America, then hid out in the coat closet until everybody left.
I'm sitting here listening to fat joe and doing kegels I have given up
a reward? ill think of something
if its not drugs or food I swear to god ill throw a fit
might I remind you I fucked a 21 year old and almost did coke with strangers? you definitely came out on top
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