Also do the "tongue the pee-hole" thing.
i wish we had morning classes together so we can spike our coffee.
When I realized it was a dog, and I still had a boner, it was awkward.
in light of our recent drunken behavior, i think it's time we seriously consider hiring ourselves a babysitter.
He was having an allergic reaction to that new brand of vodka Eric brought, so he just started chasing with benadryl.. Talk about commitment.
His tongue was like Jesus himself was blessing my boobs for eternal ecstasy.
I'm not so sure Jesus approves of such activities, but ok.
oh, so if i go friday and she's there, you are going to be my sponsor for not banging the crazy chick
So this is what you do on your hungover days off put your balls into an egg carton?
After the Jell-o shots and about 6 shots of lighter fluid brand tequila, it got to the point where breathing was painful. All I could do was pray I didn't fall asleep in the front yard.
I think I should start a match.com profile and put "robe lounging" as my only hobby
I'm pretty sure I just gave myself third degree burns from punching my pizza.
god dammit I AM NO LONGER PUTTING UP WITH YOUR HETEROSEXUALITY I QUIT
also I can check "jump into a moving car" off my bucket list if that tells you how tonight is going
I just puked in a chili’s bathroom... happy birthday to me
Unexpected pro of the hostel though: literally down the street from Coors Field. I could literally fart on the building in five minutes.
Randomize
