Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
well..after leaving the bar you handed me your wallet and said you didnt need it cause you were going to find the cash cab and added 'i'll see you on tv'
Left for charity run at 5AM. Saw a pigeon eating last night's vomit and a pair of shame-walkers in high heels. Nature at it's finest.
Today as a vday present for myself I am walking in between any couples I see on campus.
once you started introducing yourself as "running-bear" i knew you were beyond fucked up
Yeah I'm a responsible adult man but I legally unbind myself from anything that occurred that evening and am in no way responsible for those actions.
The drag queen we did coke with is going to be on Ru Paul's drag race. I feel so proud.
i swear i just dislocated a hip staying still
I'm going to teach Troy such valuable life lessons. Yesterday I told him to stay away from girls who drink redbull and vodkas.
That moment when you see yourself in a security camera feed and realize you forgot a bra. And pants.
I had a dream that I had to take a breathalyzer but then it turned out to be a bong....why can't that be real life?
I am at a new level of appreciation for drunk-you, who threw up into her own sweatshirt pocket last night in the car. Brava.
Smoked a blunt with my dad then introduced him to cinnabon delights. Today was a good day.
I don't know what she looks like but I'm pretty sure she has a pussy.
On the good side I got hit on by a cute college guy. But the bad side was having sex in a frat house for first time in 9 years
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