I met a girl last nite that charged by the inch. i didnt have enough money but i figured shed be a good deal for u
Dude, I don't think I'll ever be able to find a girl for me...
Is this the gay conversation?
I just saw a man with a full beard and frosted tips
there is no god
just threw up into the cup of Gatorade I was hoping would settle my stomach. thanks again, alcohol.
I just watched my mom open a wine bottle with an electric drill. I have never been so proud.
He just turned 21, it's very obvious the end of their relationship is near. Now we play the waiting game.
Yes, you can 69 in a fiat. But I think I have permanent nerve damage
He was uncircumcised
It was like inception. A penis within a penis within a penis
I wanna just rip ass and see his reaction but i bet itd be better to shatter that illusion when hes drunk
i ended up making out with my new neighbor in a stranger's car that we found unlocked on a driveway somewhere. apparently drunk self never say "no" to adventure.
I woke up with my panties in the cat food dish, and everything covered in honey and bruises.
Officially crunch time. It's my last year of grad school and I've yet to get blown in a school library. The parking garage was less than a block away though.
I mean I puked all over three separate towns last night and I still think you're the one who should reevaluate their life.
I wanna eat mushrooms and cuddle with a million dogs at once. I wanna know what heaven is like
Idk, but the girl in his story had really nice eyebrows and was singing The Climb. How about you CLIMB the fuck away from my man
FORGET THE EYEBROWS
Randomize
