it was worse than that time i tried giving evan head 4 days post nose job.
new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
she kept yelling 'call me bella'
and this is why i am such an inspirational person, i am the Joel Osteen of alcoholics.
i am devastated. she was DTF and I was about to puke, i told her to wait outside my room for a second. Puked. Passed out woke up, she was gone. Found puke stains on my keyboard that seem to spell out youporn....
with all this snow coming, and no school, I figure why not try every possible liquor snowcone.
also, just kill me. literally hit me with a vehicle, or an aircraft, something that will ultimately make me forget tonight.
How big of a disservice to the economy would we be doing if we didn't drink every day holiday break?
I'm unsure as to how you were able to snapchat me with your hands duck taped to beer, but I appreciated it nonetheless.
You told your family you're bi over the phone?!
We were talking about exes and it just came out....and so did I.
Got home & pissed on my moms carpet like a bear in the woods. I woke up to a picture message with me passed out on the floor with my pants down & hands covering my face. I've had an awkward week
It was all good until his cat started licking my nipple along with him
As a BFF it is your duty to answer when I drunk call you at 3 in the morning because I couldn't find a knife to cut that cake. I finally found one, fell asleep with it and the cake in bed. K thanks bye.
Just opened my sisters laptop to "cute places to lose my virginity" googled last
I need you to sex the hangover out of me again.
Randomize
