It wouldn't matter if you are Jesus Christ himself, you are not getting into the bar tonight
This bar is like a mediocre whore house....but free
Fact: The drinking you do in college doesn't affect your liver in real life.
you need to leave class get on facebook and start untagging IMMEDIATELY
at the last minute we also decided to throw an egg in the beer bong. and he drank it, shell and all.
Who ate shrimp cocktail in my bathroom last night?
why are all my papers due the day after my potential hangover
I call it a party but only because that sounds better than 8 people getting drunk around a pool.
I just remembered that last night I ate nachos off of someone else's table with a stranger
Regardless of age or alcohol consumption, the knowledge that my dad spanks my mom sexually has the very real potential to fuck my shit up.
They were swingers. Real swingers. Thought it was going to be awesome until some fat guy tried to put my dick in his mouth.
Never have i felt more judged than when i was throwing up in front of a hello kitty shower curtain at 5 in the morn
Some girl is sitting topless in the kitchen and having a Skype video chat with some guy. I already like it here.
It was the easiest thing I've ever done. 3am she walked into my room, saw my Buffalo Bills blanket, said go bills and got naked.
Is Facebook telling the truth about your nipples?!
Randomize
