She asked to borrow my chapstick then said "I promise I won't get herpes on it"
I'm pregaming with America's Best Dance Crew.
Do a shot everytime Lil' Mama mispronounces a word.
i'm transferring to degrassi. i don't care that it's severely canadian. classes are five minutes long, there's no actual work and you can get oot of class whenever you want to go have a dramatic scene with someone in the hall
we saw a llama on the side of the road. That's when we knew everything was going to be alright.
Thanks for convincing the hot dog guy to give me one for $1 after I drunkenly dropped the first one. I loved your reasoning "I know you mark that shit up! I work in retail!"
I'll always be here to give you immoral support.
This is your typical drubkba Amy test. Shout out to jisus for auto correct
I'm pretty sure that when my parents bought me those savings bonds they thought it would go towards something useful like tuition. Not your bail.
I told you I'd buy you lunch.
FULL ON LADY WOOD. YOU CAN SEE THE VEIN
I'll check it out in the morning. Tonight has been reserved for getting baked and covering myself in kittens because THAT IS AN OPTION.
Ladies and gentlemen, the only person I know who would keg stand in pearls and a bow.
I should come with a warning like "do not feed me tequila or cocaine, I will ruin the party and cry"
I am getting off work an hour early just to watch you drink. Never let it be said that I don't love you.
i woke up to drewlling on a plate of eggrolls half naked halfway between my bed and the floor, and i have no idea where my pants went
If I wanna spend the whole night tied up and getting railed I'm allowed to do so
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