that girl looks like she smells like hot dog water...
I don't know what your problem is but seriously you're a cunt for throwing up that song on your page. It's rude as fuck
omg its myspace i didnt think anyone took that seriously anymore
just heard 2 nerds making fun of a girl for mispronouncing stochiometry. they followed it up by discussing the mathematical equation for getting laid. my day just became 100x better.
The iPad is going to make my porn collection SO much more glossier... thanks steve jobs.
We smoked a joint and talked about his parent's divorce. It was like being fifteen all over again.
Holy shit. Do you realize what this means? Officially all of my ex-bfs are either dead or gay
professor came back from spring break missing a tooth
he made me feel like a shish kabob. his dick was the skewer.
and you said he wasn't worth calling.
Seriously I will never run in my wedges while drinking racing home to have sex ever again
I ate 12 cupcakes in less than 24 hours, so no judgement here.
Someone's vagina was extra sandy cause the left side of my bed feels like the beach.
As soon as I got there, you appeared out of no where, yelled "they're giving away free cigarettes!" in my face and then disappeared and I didn't see you the rest of the night.
if you didn't cry because you couldn't find me and then pee your bed, your wingman status would totally be revoked for leaving me at that party.
I just watched two birds fight or fuck. It was crazy. Another bird was watching closer and I know that bird understood what was happening better than me.
Please come pick up your twin. She's tap dancing in her underwear and that's not how you want yourself represented.
Randomize
