So we made editble underwear with fruit roll ups and fruit by the foot
The girl here has a popped collar. Can I slap her?
Yes. For all mankind please do.
laying in bed listening to christian music, jealous of the hope they have for their life. also need to beat off, can i think about you?
i didnt like the question options for my yahoo account..so i made up the question and it was "favorite bathroom to shit in"
I'm worried I'm going to miss my flight so I set a series of alarms on my phone to act as checkpoints to make sure I'll be there. 2am-stop drinking; 4am-stop fucking stephanie, get some sleep; 5am-wake up, fuck stephanie once more; 6am-get to the airport
she just pulled a hulk hogan to make her point. no idea how it helped
What are you talking about?! I shot gunned a monster while simaltaneously blowing gym boy Todd. If I'm not the poster child for being well rounded and versatile I have no idea what NYU is looking for
I just lit a candle in my room using axe and a lighter, that's how bored I am. Let's get schwasted.
You just kept yelling and saying, "IM NOT GOING TO STOP YELLING UNTIL YOU TAKE THAT SHOT"
The moment buddy the elf found out he was human is exactly like the moment I realized I was gay
I told my therapist about the other night and he actually whistled and said "wow that is not good."
she made me cum so hard I dislocated my jaw. I'm keeping her
How the fuck did we end up at a strip club last night.. We started the night playing bingo at a church
If body pillows had a built in vibrator attached I would literally never need a boyfriend again
I'm so sorry for trying to eat your puzzle last night...
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