Question. A woman tells her guy she's on birth control. Stops taking it to have a kid to force the guy to be responsible and with her. What rights does that guy have
None he's f-d
I seriously can't date anymore I forgot how to hide my crazy
You leave a trail of fuck everywhere you go
i think i pulled off the nice guy thing too well. it just backfired later on when she thought i was actually nice.
She keeps stunt undies in her bag, 2 sizes too small. She leaves them behind so the guy thinks he was luckier than he was...
the bouncer watched the girl drop her ID, saw me pick it up and say OMG SHE LOOKS LIKE ME, and then let me use it to get into the bar
I would rather deep fry my own cock while it's still attached to me than have his life.
she asked him to cuddle cuz she was cold and instead he got up, moved the space heater to her side of the bed, and went back to sleep
i have a feeling i am the only one who can successfully pull off the "slutty kentucky derby" look.
I just listened to "Eye of the Tiger" and did 5 shots to prep going over to see him.
He had a drawn-on fu manchu and now my vagina has one too.
He said I looked like a ballsack and I tried to choke him out with my Ghostbusters pajama pants. Happy fucking Halloween.
I've found my soulmate with the cardboard Dos Equis man.
I'm glad you enjoyed the night but why were you calling me "daddy"?
It's probably not a good thing when it isn't even 6:30 and I've already drank an entire bottle of wine. By myself. I'm watching Spice World and I just bought 2 Spice Girls albums off itunes.
Make that 3 Spice Girls albums.
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