Where are you?
In a non slutty way
@ a funeral. fucking miss uuuu
I just need someone to hold me and tell me i dont turn boys gay
only my mom would pack illegal paraphernalia in a care package..
It feels kinda weird thanking you for sucking my dick, but I just don't know what else to do right now
I said we should get a taxi and you were waving down cars, three of which were cops and one of them slowed down and shook his head then kept driving
He didn't think we needed a taxi
Either I'm still drunk or the right side of the bed is now the left side.
My makeup looks extraordinary for nine tequila shots, running four blocks, falling asleep with my face in the toilet, and doing the walk of shame across campus in the rain. And to think I'm single.
It was good. Ended up having a 3 hr make out session with her
What is this high school
There was a lot of catching up to do bro
Life lesson 8263 if drinking a beer in the shower be careful when shampooing... Tresemme flavored rolling rock sucks
we had a "who's sex playlist is better?" fight.....
Not sure but if it exists I will find it and I will fill my face with it
I feel like I don't even know what's gonna happen when we first see each other. It'll be like explosions and glitter and a unicorn will run by pulling a sleigh of alcohol and sex.
Why can't you just be normal and get dick pics from your exes like everyone else?
I'm like the kinda excited when David After Dentist stands up in his seat, screams, and collapses
Randomize
