ok i said sorry. what else do you want?
100 blowjobs
she thought don quixote was a type of tequila.
i would totally change schools right now just to be that new girl everyone wants
due to concerns over safety, the theme of the 'naked fondue party' has now been changed to the 'naked fondue party with optional apron' please b.y.o.apron. extra prizes for most creative apron.
is election day enough of a holiday to justify getting fucked up on a tuesday?
He is eating chips off the floor in the emergency room..
It looks like sephora exploded on his dick, so i assumed I was the second girl that gave him head that night.
The yoga party turned into an underwear party because we are all incompetent when it comes to tying bed sheets.
This has been a Party Success Story
Everybodys gonna want to make out w me dressed as big bird
Big bird is like some childhood daddy fantasy come true for carnival
Just text him and be like do you want this pussy or not. You have three seconds to respond.
Apparently my thong was thrown in the cornfield last night. No one will tell me why.
Getting so old my power naps are turning into, "can I reasonably just go to bed at this time?"
How did I end up with the cock ring?!
Do you think the hole in the ceiling will count against our security deposit?
I feel like 20 angels jizzed in my mouth. This cupcake is DELICIOUS!
Randomize
