He's a collector of sorts
Any cool stuff?
You should see the collection of booggers in the carpet next to his desk
my math teacher staples burger king applications to failed tests
My Vagina smells like Nemo again.
No matter how fun it seemed the night before you will always regret taking those pictures, you will always regret eating as much as you did, but you will never regret the great lengths you had to got to get those bruises.
Def drinking wine from a 4 liter jug at 11 am. If i call you in 20 years talking about 12 steps, please trace is back to this moment.
She's been drinking and was roller blading. I'm sure you can do the math
You'd be surprised at the stuff my vagina tells my brain to say
You did that scary laugh you always do when you're blacking out except she's never heard it before and though you were choking and screamed at all of us when we didn't call an ambulance
I thought i didnt really feel whatever i snorted last night until i just realized i think i asked this dude to punch me fight club style
Maybe whip a sausage around while you do it and pour some beer on you. Like a German white snake video
Just remember that no one else gets to suck his dick but you, feel honored. It's like the Olympic torch of life is being passed off to you and it's your time to run
Well just give me the address, I'll bring the bourbon. If they let that into mental institutions
He's bringing a lesbian pretending to be his girlfriend to family Christmas. I can not wait to see how this goes.
We watched ESPN, hooked up, got waffles. You know, a typical weekend.
so i showed up to the bars in a sombrero and a tie as a headband... so yeah, they didn't let me in
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