I might be drunk enough to make out with you. You don't want to miss this unique opportunity.
i wonder if she has dreads down there too...
you figure out which one you wanna sleep with, & I'll sleep with the other one. problem solved
is it bad that I didn't wash the cum out of my hair because it keeps my curls intact?
So... on the count of three, we are going to forget last night ever happened... 1...2...3
Is it sad that I just used my electrical knowledge to not only fix but improve my vibrator?
she got into med school, i feel dumb for banging her dance major friend
Quick! What do I wear on a 4 hour road trip with an older guy in the army I had pantomime sex with in a hotel a few months ago?
He left an apology note saying he had to work and that there was coffee, OJ and food on the table with two Excedrin. I left his spare key with the door guard and she said "too bad I don't go for skinny white boys or I'd jump you both!" Best one night stand ever.
Only Jon could get an entire commuter train to chant "Ride! Jon! Home!" to get a girl in bed.
im on the hungover til tuesday pabst blue ribbon diet
So I'm going to regale you with a tale of someone who went out, was fed way to many shots, got super wasted and now has a date with one of the security guards from the building but has no idea what his name is. That someone is me
Then James put his arms through the window and grabbed him, like he was Robocop. A nerdy, portly Robocop.
Who is this?
But I don't see you as the jesus riding a dinosaur with a machine gun type of guy
I think even the taco bell employees judged me
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