There was an extended period of my adolescent life where my friends and I would get high, drive around in my minivan listening exclusively to the wu tang clan, and intentionally crash into snowbanks
Afterwards she curled up in my dog's bed and slept there all night
How mad was your dog?
How long after st. Patrick's day is it ok to shit green before I should seek medicial attention?
We walked in and they were fucking to Somewhere Over the Rainbow... I need a new roommate.
Seriously. He was just sitting there naked in the dark with a boner pissed that I came home late.
is it sad that I can recall my outfits by who took them off?
Wore last nights jeans to Christmas Dinner with the fam, found a half gram of blow, while they're praying ill be railing.
I dont care what I am for halloween, as long as i'm not a father after
Found her with a stray dog now called champagne, crying about how she feels a mom now. Had to take her home. The dog too.
I'm still hoping for it dude. Random north dakota pussy. If my 16 year old self knew that these were my dreams he would so try to beat me up, and i think he could.
So did he inherit the massive family cock?
:(
I went to the bathroom, came back, and my friend was sleeping leaning up against the stripper pole.
I've been watching porn with my cat lately. No shame
I'm just impressed that you can puke without losing your gum
Don't worry I sent a creepy stalker message to a guy I slept with 6 years ago, Sunday Funday rock bottom
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