Princeton has an emergency contraception worldwide website. It is in moments like these that I love my university
Apparently when he woke up I was tripping my face off. Everytime the cat meowed I would meow back. This went on for several hours.
Did you see the soccer ref give that girl the red card as she was being kicked out of the party?
He offered but I said no. I didn't think it'd be cool to accept cupcakes in the mens room of a gentlemans club.
Dude i think i got lasagna in my eye
She bought a fucking hedgehog. And that's just the tip of the crazy iceberg.
There are regrets in my world today- mostly jager at that fucking altitude
I had to brake up with him.
In my experience drinking helps.
You dont want to know why?
Not really. I want to drink.
Just got a picture message from my sister of the two of us wearing cowboy hats and pressing our bare asses together. Do you remember enough to explain?
Kyle found me outside his apartment in the hallway. Said he didn't hear me knock bt smelled alcohol through the door. I'm sucha bitch to my liver
Tomorrow I need you to slap me in the face. I'll explain then
Go have fun. I'm gonna go shower off the regret.
I think I pulled a muscle in my tongue.
sorry? thank you? I love you?
I fell into a police barricade, a cop helped me up and asked if I've been drinking. I just looked at him and said "dude.." He proceeded to take out his handcuffs
I hate csi yet I find myself watching a full marathon. I am also eating hotdog buns stuffed with barbecue chips and they are quite tasty
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