1:12am: That's just how i roll, and this dress she is wearing is dirty and needs to get pulled over her head.
I just saw a girl play flip cup with only her tongue
I'm in love
It was kinda bitchy last night when i brought up my pregnancy scare and you said "shotty playing with it"
oh hey just found a glowstick in my tits. fuck yes new years eve
So about class tomorrow..... i,ll be there. But I may be still a bit drink and wearing a suit. I'll explain when I get there.
Everyone agrees they like your mother better drunk
... was I dreaming when we did coke off of the xbox, or did that really happen?
He was making Jim beam nachos. Chips soaked in whiskey with cheese
I sang Sweet Caroline with a homeless man and made him 25 bucks. Redbull vodka gives you wings!
He facetimed with his son when he was still inside of me. If that's not a dedicated dad I don't know what is
I literally cut myself out of my pants. What is my life.
...I just added shower water to my vodka on ice\n#sendhelp
YOU ATE THE FUCKING GOLDFISH!?
No bra. No panties. Makeup from last night. At work right now. I am trash.
There is a baby in my apartment. What the fuck happened last night?
Randomize