I am about to get in a knife fight over a corn dog.
question: masturbation: how much is too much? I think i'm about to tip toe a fine line
Just spent 45mins blow drying a joint i dropped in a beer....i felt like i dropped his infant child....
You lit the bowl with a rolled up paper towel that you ignited on the stove.
threw up outside of the dorms in the parking lot in the pouring rain on the first day of class, i'd say summer is off to a good start.
No worries. On my way home to get ski poles and wipe the sick off my face. Then it's time to get drunk in the park
You know how the doctor said I need to stop being vegan unless I find a way to get more protein? There's protein in beer. The doctor wants me to drink more beer.
He gave me one look and told me I'm not allowed to board the plane if I'm still as drunk by departure time.
Then you bent down and whispered, "excuse me mr. Stair, could you please stop moving?"
thank you for extending my knowledge of the effects of vodka. speak of what happened last night and i will kill you and send your fingers to your loved ones.
Only I could get hit on by homophobic straight guys in a drag bar.
come over we're fb stalking guys who were dressed as bananas last night because i can't remember which one i blew
I woke up this morning next to my computer with Google search results for "how to put out a fire."
I'm very scared to turn around.
You do it and I'll burn these mermaid pants so help me God.
I can't say too many people would say watching their drunk best friends fuck in a hot tub is very normal.
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