I'm getting the same feeling waiting for the web-page to load that has my final grades that I get when I take a pregnancy test. I think I'm gonna leave my computer for 3 minutes.
Someones car got stolen, everyone is yelling, and im drunk just sayin yeah buddy over and over again
shes a 6ft ginger. she brings nothing to the table except for awkwardness
My gynecologist inadvertently complimented your penis.
Let's just say that watching the sunrise in a space helmet is really the only way to do it.
Well duh, alcohol and getting fucked up are the world's common languages.
No padding. I spent my whole summer with my nips out. October don't need that too.
I wrapped my scarf around his head and then made him go down on me
And I also said, "probe me"
Looking back on this weekend, I'm most grateful I never brought up with word "toe-fucking" at the bachelorette party.
I'm hungry, horney and thirsty. Pick two you want to help out with.(please pick horney)
Firstly: alligator costume is happening anyway. But I'll see what I can do about the balls.
Have you ever wanted to murder the Sun? To bring the life-giving fusion reactor to a bitter end because of the sheer agony it brings to your eyes as it keeps you awake. And for waking the birds. Fuck birds.
woke up to find a case of beer in the oven and a random puppy in the house...guess i had a party last night?
Unless your name is actually "Ticfj" like my phone says, I have no idea who you are...
My Mormon mother just found a butt-plug in our AirBnB closet.
Randomize
