you really need to stop walk of shaming home from theme parties.
So I thought I was doing pretty good and then I sneezed and prematurely ejaculated...
I can make a handprint turkey for extra credit in history. I feel like the word college should be in quotes on the school letterhead.
Hey, could you leave the door unlocked? Keys seem hard right now.
So at this point...I'm sure you heard the story about Saturday night
We did it and he fell asleep and I was bored so I decided to go back to the party...is that bad?
You just said we could build a blanket and pillow "fuck fort." Of course I'm never leaving you.
Yes he was puking but in the only light of the whole parking lot and he was resting in the patch of clovers and he just was a garden fairy
The girls danced. I drank. Then I danced cause I was drunk. Then I ripped tim's shirt off cause I'm awesome.
It was a great idea until we got stuck in a ditch. We had to call redneck cousin 1
I didnt finish. My brain kept playing the duck tales theme thru the entire blow job
My mother is a bitch. She just outed me to my dad. He wants to meet you by the way...
Ick. That's not even the fun kind of punishment.
On a scale of 1-10, how inappropriate is it to sneak into someone's box of sex toys and put googly eyes on their vibrator?
I am no longer embarassed by my vagina
It concerns why you would be in the first place, but I'd rather not know
Randomize
