guys are only as good as the porn they watch
At least he could have found a MILF, she's a dbl bagger. No wonder he goes to counseling.
Yeah..you can't spell Prozac without Zac(h).
So i know you wont get this until you land, but if i'm late its cause i was having sex. being blunt and hope that explains things.
screw jello shots the kids from the culinary school made pudding shots with 4 loko.
You pulled down your pants, pissed in the recliner, and wiped yourself with my utility bill. I thought it was in the worlds best interest to put you to bed.
Ya I guess if we compared our actions now with our actions 2 years ago. We are definitely in a constant state of shit showness.
Taking Gomer to the ER. He tore something trying to stretch his nutsack enough to put his balls in his own ass. I need new friends.
Three Architectural classes: $990.00 Architectural supplies: $300.00 Changing majors and using my architectural supplies to roll blunts: Priceless
I'm doing laundry from this weekend.. That poor shirt I wore to the rave smells like a dead animal that rolled in weed and pain..
Just walk of shamed past a 5 year old on my way out of my booty call. He waved at me. Is this the single life I've been missing?
You're not drunk til you wake your roommates up screaming at your ceiling fan
Would you still love me and fuck me doggie style if I had a dinosaur tramp stamp?
All I know is if i get a free preview weekend of HBO then I am recording Kindergarten Cop.
CyberMonday=Bulk Condom Shopping For 2018
If I slept with her my dick would come out glittery
coward.
Randomize