Skip Greektown and come to Geektown. I just want to cuddle.
After the VIP Latina experience at the strip club last night, I am rooting for Mexico in this years World Cup.
You hit on my mom and then passed out in the kiddie pool.
Were you rubbing your penis on me while I slept? I smell like penis.
Look, I'm just saying... paying ur respects to the neighbors who had a death in the family with food u steal from the neighbors having the cookout may result in a negative karma situation.
I would rather burn my vagina off with a damn flame thrower before I would touch anything that has touched her skank ass.
im in the library and there's this guy on a computer just staring at a google image of beer. finals week is rough.
Dude, you can't even imagine the trip, I actually thought that there were Care Bears sitting next to me at the bar, I'm pretty sure I started hitting on the pink one.
I was Jaeger weird. I was rolling on the floor pretending to be an Olympic gymnast and my name was Gina
Does he know you were at a strip club taking shots of tequila right before you babysat his son?
Liquor has joined the party. Aly just fucking yelled "I LOVE COOKING" and poured margarita mixer, ice and tequila into the blender.
Date with Air Force guy was nice btw. And for my next trick I'll talk him into fucking me in his fighter jet at 30,000 ft.
I FLASHED A GUY AT MCDONALDS FOR A FREE BREAKFAST BURRITO. IT WORKED!
He's finally divorcing her, so naturally he tells me that we're not exclusive anymore. His penis 'wants what it wants' apparently.
when I said eat the rich I didn't mean like that but here we are sucking that capitalist dick
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