last night I thought his shirt said yale... but this morning it definitely says old navy.
And surprisingly enough iPhone does not have an app for Russian mail order brides.
You tried to pay the bartender in graduation checks, I think you'll be fine in the real world.
if you were drunk and peed in your friend's washing maching, would you send an "i'm sorry" text or say nothing at all?
all hypothetical of course
it's been like two and a half months. And I swear, I keep seeing walking dicks. I think I'm going crazy cause of lack of sex..
and when he finished he handed me a baby wipe so i could clean up. i'm ok with the fact that he has kids, but not sure how to react to this.
he might be the rich husband I pretend to love for the rest of my life!!!!
I just saw my first passed out person, sprawled out on the sidewalk like they died. I wanted to take a pic but I thought that screamed "tourist"
I just feel like a girl who's never eaten a pb&j probably doesn't swallow
Indoor beer darts at Rafs just turned into a trust exercise of putting your hand on the wall and closing your eyes while the other throws.. Almost gave Cale a Tracheotomy
I'm tired and starving, and I'm pretty sure I just cost the company 33,000 dollars...fuck you and you're "you'll love going to work high" nonsense.
Promise me you won't have sex in my room
I can't promise you that, but I promise you that I'll try
Might want to in your tub tho. That thing is fucking huge.
She is watching her grandpa for the day and the dude just whipped it out and started jerking off while watching the View.
I feel as if some line has been crossed, but only in this vague, WTF sort of way.
Well hell, he's gotta sleep in the bed he's made. Multiple times. For multiple girls I'm sure.
Randomize
