end the night at a gay bar...not sure how...but why the fuck do i have two condoms in my pocket?
You stood up gave the stripper 15 ones in a wad, hugged her and then sat back down.
I can't remember much about walking home last night. I think I kicked a dog.
Sorry I forced you to take an adderall at 1am and then proceeded to dance to Lose Yourself outside of Qdoba.
Februarys looking very promising in the vaginal department
I think i just fucked the same guy a second time without realizing it....does that make me a good whore or a bad whore???
My 19 year old brother just hooked up with his 45 year old cougar kindergarten teacher. These sorts of situations make me realize why the sorority girls call him Wondercock
It was all going fine until I had to chug that strawberita bud light. That really ended badly.
him crossdressing on the weekends is awkward but not a deal breaker for me.
are you listening to the theme from Jurassic Park whilst pooping?
if you want to know how my night is going I just ugly cried in the cheesecake factory
mcfuck me up
MCFUCK ME UP INSIDE
My friends got engaged today and I learned the techniques of going upside down on a stripper pole. I'm not really sure who won...
sorry for any reference made toward your boobs or making you feel pregnant or incapable of peeing. make it a wonderful day.
I have mystery bruises on my right knee, right arm, under my chin, and on my forehead. What the fuck happened last night??
Randomize
