What do you want me to say to her? "Oh hey, I need to borrow your soon to be husband to make a porn, cool?"
I'd really appreciate it if we could dress up as pilgrims and indians for the thanksgiving eve bar crawl
The interviewer had a hook for his right hand I TRIED TO SHAKE HIS HOOK WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME
they're both coked to the gills having a shouting match about the powers and abilities of godzilla. and using the wikipedia entry on the topic to support their respective arguments.
Even the bar was yelling boobs, so of course the shirt came off
Smoked a Vape in the library status: completed
I'm so confused. I feel like I just intentionally took roofies to see where I'd end up.
i ended up playing naked naked monopoly and hangman with my dealer. i really love my life.
Speaking of fellatio on fictional characters, the Stay Puft Marshmallow Man would be a delicious blowjob.
Yeah i was handcuffed to the bed all night but i actually slept like a baby
My very favorite thing in the whole world is when guys try to booty call her as I'm fucking her. Sucks to suck.
I'm sorry I never said I wasn't coming home last night. To my defense I did type and send a text, only I was too drunk to realize I sent it to the guy I was with instead of you.
you made out with another girl for some wings
We dont have cups... so were doing shots out of bowls like puppies
It wasn't my fault.
You let her suck your neck. Yes it was your fault.
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