You did that once after drunk driving from a photo shoot
That was very cool/italian of you
Which brings me to my next point, how come italians are so well adapted to drunk driving
So #1 way to come back last night and #2 wishbone and I broke into his house and i opened joey's door and u were both passed out and pantless.
Just burped. Tasted like beer and cherios...Beerios. This is gonna be quite a day.
The album was titled "Best Night Ever" until she found out she was preggers and switched it to "God Punishes Sluts"
First time i ever had an awkward silence during sex.
you rearended a car with your bike and then puked all over his back windshield. They made BUI's for you.
We are gonna be 90 years old in wheelchairs at the nursing home sitting at computers poking each other and waiting for the other to die so we will have the last facebook poke.
im not sure. I kicked him in the ear last night trying to kick a plastic cup off his head to prove I can kick higher than anyone.
Theres a guy in your room wearing a franzi box costume and some girl is in the box giving him head.
I'm not trying to be dramatic but if someone makes you choose between getting a Brazilian or dying. For the sake of your sanity just fucking die
Leave it to me to sleep w a guy who gets poison ivy on his dick
Sally, Your mom and my mom hooked up in college, we must uphold this tradition.
we were running around the halls trying to bloodhound search out the source of the weed smell, but we ran into six other people doing the same thing, and they all said they assumed it was us.
During my first week as an adjunct prof, I played a fiercely fought game of squash with a law student and we wound up having hot, sweaty, angry sex right on the floor of the court. She is either the best or worst thing to happen to my academic career. Will let you know.
I just put on the jeans I was wearing last night and pulled 4 baby carrots out of my back pocket....
Randomize
