ya know if you hadnt broke up with me, that porno we made wouldnt have a 3.3 rating on youporn right now...
I have found the one flaw to the great pride I took as a guy to not have to sit down to pee...having to sneeze while peeing.
giving a blow job on a jetski isn't as easy as it sounds.
Do you think there are girls out there that really do like small penis?
I need a booty call who doesn't know my boyfriend or my friends.
On the bright side I still get a $20 referral bonus at the plasma center even though he passed out during donation because he was so high.
How do I tell my Dad that in the picture he has of me and my brother as the background of his phone we were both rolling face on ecstasy?
I think I should advise against you hooking up with a guy that throws "the shocker" up in all of his pictures on facebook. Just sayin.
I'm standing up, for my all my brothers and sisters, and fighting against whiskey dick.
My FitBit tracked the calories I burned during sex. Hello 2015!
I wish so many great beards were not attached to even greater jerks. All that face sitting potential wasted. Some of the greatest tragedies of this century.
Now just crop his dad out and add it to the spank bank.
You wanna come over?
Too high to be booty called. My cereal is growing hair.
Do you know anything about how the saran wrap ended up on my toilet seat?
The party pretty much ended once she shit on the couch
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