we did anal to Party In The USA and he busted to Firefies .. felt like we were fucking in a middle school dance
this is never going to happen for me, I think he thinks I'm crazy
well you did scream "PLEASE! I'LL S YOUR D IN FRONT OF EVERYONE"
The lady at the touchless car wash just gave me the look of death. How do I say, "sorry it's not my puke" in Spanish?
I just saw her punch a kid in the face.. i always knew she was the girl for me.
He doesn't make grammatical errors. Even while getting head.
This whole night would have been avoided if the liquor store had air heads
U can find me on my couch hungover eatin tuna evaluating my life
Life seems so much brighter and more vibrant after you have sex with a 20 year old. It's like how Kansas was in black and white and Oz was in technicolor.
The feeling are messing with the penis
A gay guy went down on me in the club bathroom and then fixed my makeup for me
its gonna be a great night
You know what else? He didn't even get to see my butt. And my butt is really cute. Car sex is awful.
When i said you could use my car and have sex in the back....i wasn't being serious.
You kept on yelling traitor and threatened to kill him and everyone he loves because he played beerpong with someone else
I kept my extra Molly pill in my wallet in the change part, that's also where I keep my body jewelry while I'm working. The nose ring punctured the pill essentially coating itself in MDMA. My nose ring is back in my nose. This could be entertaining
Dude, she was there with her husband and I was there with my wife. Of course we banged in the bathroom.
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