I guess she didn't feel like it. There was hair all over it and everything
I wasn't on board with that statement until "home made dinosaurs"
Oh no I havn't even told you about the naked asians yet
There are going to be so many Snookis this Halloween that I might just dress as the guy that hit her and punch them all in the face
Dude... there's chunks of hair all over the floor, and no one knows how they got there. You guys just made out right?
Just explain how I got from the bar to a house I've never been in, waking up to a cop in uniform ripping a bong
You may see me wearing your shirt to class. It's because I still have the spins and I'm anticipating throwing up on it. Asshole.
I told you all we needed steroids to survive the tour de franzia, like the bikers. But nobody listened...
Everyone keeps telling me I look so healthy and happy today: the power of the penis people!!
The bar would not accept my money. I have reached God status here
I spent the entire night stroking his hair. He was cool with it. Never thought a ginger stoner would help me work through my social anxiety but here we are.
I had a sex dream about Fox Mulder, and the Royals just won the World Series. My life is complete.
The sex was so good I feel like I could run a triathlon, hit big at the casino, and defeat ISIS.
Well I'm back. Could you fill me in on what I missed?
You don't want to know. Trust me.
I don't know where I'm at. But I'm pretty sure what I'm looking at is a small bear.
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