omg omg i just fucked paul. i need to stop doing this kind of thing.
wait, who's paul?
exactly.
my ass just sighed. even my farts are tired.
We aren't going to mix hockey and sex texts tonight.
I totally agree. all sexting is on hold till after the games over.
Playoffs. This shit is serious.
Dubbing lion king over planet earth. That stoned.
So I just learned that my father was teaching me rules for drinking games when I was 5.
You SHOULD feel empty, we were at the top of our game, and by that i mean snorting things we don't understand and only a few steps away from adultery.
Woke up naked wearing mismatched earrings. Didn't even make it to the bar.
It was a karaoke bar combined with a liquor store and had a donkey pen in the back.
Keeping it classy as usual I see
I'm sorry. I just realized our 'big night out' ended up being you driving my high ass to get burritos and back.
You told the cop you where the star of the Track team and tried to run away. So yeah, i'm not surprised.
Just thought you should know I'm having a reunion tour of Athens this weekend. Minus the weird guy I was fucking last time.
We need to get stoned and watch Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles 2. This has become a priority. Schedule accordingly.
I'm also sorry that I ate your chicken sandwich while you were throwing up....
We are so on opposite sides of the boobs spectrum
ah lol cocaine is strange when I dose I feel like an elephant running through a grocery store
Randomize
