do you remember waking up from your blackout, kissing me ever so softly on the stomach, and saying "i love you bro. so much," then passing back out?
Howd you meet this guy?
I found him next to my pants on sunday morn.
My nipple rings set off the metal detector at the courthouse this morning.
it was a whole new experience in the world of ball fondling
Meh. People are people bro. All of us are hairless psychotic apes. Happy 420.
Zach is always passed out on the floor somewhere.face down in a puddle of his own absurdity
I'm still drunk. it's summer. I just need a hot dog and an aspirin.
I enjoy it and I rock at it. I wish there were a respectable way to make giving blow jobs a career.
Don't judge them too harshly for getting kicked out of a strip club. Happens to the best of us.
You are the coolest girlfriend ever.
I love the fact that my Mom has been present at 90% of my drug deals.
Like when I see him I look straight through his appearance and just envision a big walking penis.
He has great taste in girls. I feel closer to my Eskimo sisters than my real sister...
Life achievement unlocked: I just ate a Slim Jim "Lady and the Tramp" style with a guy in a bar.
He's a 30 yr old man who voluntarily goes by Stevie and his job title is "Jumbotron Operator". There's a 97.5% chance he lives in his mom's basement. STOP THIS NOW!!!
i also remember watching someone vomit off a balcony which was kind of grim
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