Make me a promise>>> if you ever see the brats from that tv show NYC Prep walking around, you will trip them, and you wil throw drinks on them
there are singles shoved down my panties. this is the type of summer job i always wanted.
My grandma put hard boiled eggs on her lasagna. I'm not high enough for this.
Going to pass out with da shoes on. hugging wallstreet journal from tuesday. please check me for liveliness in the morning.
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
Guy next to me is looking up how to press his own ecstasy pills. I'm going to befriend him and see where this goes
Well then. It seems like we have a Mexican standoff of genitals
work has become about six times more interesting since i started fucking my boss.
If it's up to me, I'll already have my pants on and walking out before he gets soft afterward.
I think my greatest accomplishment today was probably using a bottle opener to get the cap off my fourth drink while holding the cat WITHOUT dropping him.
Oh god, what has my life become?
she was braiding my hair and singing forever young while she vommed everywhere at the same time. Talent.
I'm eating hummus off of my stomach right now.
I think I'd rather see her get hit by a car in one of those Russian dash cam videos on YouTube.
Who else will cuddle and watch the Bachelor with me then finger bang me during the rose ceremony
The last thing I remember is trying to chug the rest of the everclear, running through a fence, and laying down in the snow. I hurt.
Randomize
