I just made out with a guy for $7.
She just asked me if her C-section scar turned me on.
He said he has something to give me... I swear to God if it's a joint or a framed picture of his penis i'm going to kill him
Tell me you didn't have sex with my dad.
CHAZ BONO WILL BE ON THE NEXT SEASON OF DANCING WITH THE STARS.
Internet Is back!
MY NEWS TRUMPS YOURS.
Well girls crying gets you hard so you're not really a good standard to me
The number of times I've puked in the Walgreens bathroom is becoming way too many for my pride.
that was THE gayest party i've ever been to
To be fair, the theme was Cabaret. I don't know what you were expecting.
why do all the dudes in this porno look like billy ray cyrus
Turns out Edward 40 hands and life-sized jenga is really hard...Didn't stop you from trying. How is your concussion?
jesus, I think that canada gold metal game has completely changed all rules of acceptable drinking habits, I was fucked untill noon and I just got invited to go party when I get off work...at 600am...and NO ONE understood why i was hesitant
I don't really want to talk about it, but if anyone finds my unicorn mask with my bra in it, I would really like that back.
He told me to tell my ass that he loved and missed it, and even though he hasn't known it long, it might be the one for him
i believe in u and ur pee
I just found a live peacock hanging out behind the bar. I coerced it into my car and now I have a peacock bro that lives with me.
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